Thursday, May 17, 2007

Etiquette Lessons
People just have zero common sense these days. They talk on their cell phones whenever they feel like it, they walk in front of you like you're invisible (I'm waiting to use the snippy like "Am I invisible? No? Then why did you walk right in front of me like I was?" to some clueless dolt.), they don't keep their beastly children in control (no, I don't want to hear them scream that you won't buy them anything and I'm thisclose to tripping one of the laundromat rats that run laps with the laundry carts past me screaming), and they think everything is someone else's responsibility. are some little things I've noticed and am wondering if I'm wrong about.

Gym Etiquette
1. I don't want to hear you yapping on your cell phone while you're on the treadmill next to me. I don't care what your plans are for the evening and no one else does either. If I can hear you OVER my iPod, you're talking too damn loud.
2. Please don't douse yourself in perfume before coming to the gym. Quite honestly, I'd much rather catch an occasional whiff of sweaty person than be bombarded constantly with the hideous fragrance you bathed in.
3. Don't park your ass on one nautilus machine for 10 minutes. You might think your thighs really need work, and they might, but the rest of us would like to use that machine too.
4. If I put my step and weights out for a class and there's nobody else there yet, don't put your stuff right next to mine - there's a whole room full of space.

Drive-Through Etiquette
1. Don't lag in the line - some of us would like to move up in the line so we're not sticking out into the parking lot or street.
2. Figure out what you're ordering BEFORE you get to the menu/speaker. You've been sitting in line long enough and you can't honestly tell me you don't know what McDonalds/Burger King/Taco Bell has to offer.
3. Don't ask the other people in your car at the last minute if they want anything. This should all have been figured out before getting on line.
4. Don't order $30 worth of food. If you're ordering that much you need to do it inside and not hold up the drive-through line.
5. Pay attention for the 10 minutes you're on line. You can clean your purse/yell at your children and/or spouse/search for something under your seat later.

Laundromat Etiquette
1. Don't leave your clothes in the washer after they're done. Next time I will remove AND sell them.
2. Don't let your beastly children run around like savages. This is a place of business, not the locale for the latest "Survivor" series.
3. Don't let said beastly children run around with the laundry carts. It's dangerous and people actually do use them.
4. Ask before just grabbing the cart that is in front of my washers WITH my hangers in it.
5. See number 1. of Gym Etiquette.
6. Don't put one item in each dryer. While they are free, EVERYONE has to dry their clothing and your pillows aren't important enough to warrant a dryer for each one separately.

I mean, really, is that too much to ask?


Jerrster said...

we should be allowed to make a citizen's arrest of those people you've mentioned....then as punishment they would be humiliated in taped and put on YouTube. That would change some would be worth a try.
who's with me?

Jay said...

No, it's not so much.
Maybe you should print this out and tape up copies everywhere you go. Make sure to use highlighter.

Kerry said...

Amen Sister!

Big Pissy said...

I'm with ya, Jerr!

Curly Glamour Girlie said...

I just can't wait to use the "Am I invisible?" line. Sad thing is, the person in question would have NO idea of what I'm talking about because they'd never see themselves as being rude.

Jerr - As much as I'd like to hope that that would work.....people LOVE to see themselves, even if it is making an ass out of them!