Why The Holidays Grate On Me

The holidays are all fine and good. Time to spend with family and reflecting on what's really important and all that.

However. There's one result of the holidays that drives me crazy to no end.

Bad Holiday commercials.

They can be broken down into categories so predictable and obvious that it actually pains me to watch them:

Smarmy, Sappy Commercial. This can be for jewelry where the female finds the male so so romantic and wonderful because he bought her some sparkly bauble. It can be for some brand of coffee that brings the roving college student home. It can be for something that brings the whole family together in matching sweaters. But it's always overtly sappy and annoying. And has awful, awful music accompanying it.

Overly Expensive Commercial. Lexxus is guilty of this. There's usually some ploy to get Mom or Dad outside to the driveway to see the shiny new car with the red bow on it. How the heck do you buy a car without your spouse knowing? Are they just targeting the demographic of people who have $40,000 laying around collecting dust?? It drives me crazy to no end.

Uber-Technology Commercial. As much as I am a nerd, (merely a high nerd, but a nerd no less) and love technology, I despise unnecessary technology. Why do we need movies in the palms of our hands? Why do you need access to so much? I don't get it. So when I see commercials for phones that do everything including walking the dog, it incites me about technology in general. And the technology powers that be are simply evil for using the holidays as an excuse to tell you why you need this unnecessary technology.

Greedy Child Commercial. Why do pre-teens need cell phones? Why do they need phones that walk the dog (see above)? Why are their parents so hideous if they don't get one? These commercials disgust me most. It's as if you're being told you're a horrible parent who does not understand their child if you don't bend to their every whim. Which leads me to the.....

Bitchy Wife Commercial. Wife basically berates the husband into getting her what she wants. Gross. Do yourself a favor guy and leave her now, because this will only get worse and lead to the greedy children.

Bah humbug. I'm guessing the 4th or 5th circle of hell is reserved for commercial producers who prey on the holidays. Or so you'd hope.