I Am NOT A Pincushion or Mondays and Fridays

In the expanse of 6 days I had received:

-a blood draw for an oncologist appointment
-a needle core biopsy
-a finger stick for a blood count
-a flu shot

Needless to say after those 6 days I was completely done being poked and prodded at. On the plus side all of the poking and prodding resulted in a clean bill of health for me, which, given my tawdry medical history is a really good thing.

That being said, I just read this article online: When vital drugs run out, patients pay the price. In summary, drug companies aren't making enough or certain drugs (whether due to cost, or due to generic forms or what have you) so there are shortages or various medications. The article spoke about how one cancer patient wouldn't be able to receive part of his chemo due to the shortage of leucovorin (which is used to boost the effectiveness of the other chemo drugs the patient is receiving). What? Are we in some third world country? Are we woefully behind the times? I can't even imagine getting this kind of news from your doctor. What struck me though was the photo. One look at that recliner and iv stand and I was wooshed back 6 (SIX!) years. Mondays and Fridays spent in the room, hooked up to medicine that battled the hell out of me in the interest of making me better. Mondays and Fridays spent watching mindless television (I don't know why, but me and my fellow patients usually watched the Food Network - which is odd since most of us had issues with food at the time.) or movies I brought from home. Mondays and Fridays guzzling down root beer to get rid of the awful metallic taste brought on by my chemo. Mondays and Fridays being the person in the recliner, but still feeling better emotionally than the person watching me in the recliner. Mondays and Friday nights spent recouping and just feeling miserable. I know exactly what the man in the blue shirt is thinking and feeling and it hurts like hell.

Join the Band

I want to run away and join a band. Preferably one like this one:

Hey Marseilles: Tiny Desk Concert

Seriously? I am really digging the whole "non-traditional instruments playing cute Parisian type music" band thing.

I even have a cute, quirky wardrobe to wear to all of the gigs. Really.

A Whirlwind of a Weekend

Oof. It was an action-packed weekend. Saturday started with a program at the Museum - an art conservator talking about the process of conserving artwork and projects he's done. It was well attended and very interesting. I was glued to his presentation. Then it was off to the Buckley Fair. Luke was not a happy camper that day. Overwhelmed by people wanting to poke at him and coo at how big he's gotten. But some down time in the money room calmed him down and he even fell asleep on the way home after a jaunt to Trader Joes. I *heart* TJs. I love that their products are of high quality, but lower price. I love that they give samples. I love that they sell bananas by the piece instead of the pound so Mr. Bear can nibble on one while we shop. In fact, that's the first thing he asks for when we get there.

Sunday was equally as chaotic - I actually RAN with Luke. In a non-jogging stroller. A regular old umbrella stroller. Needless to say it wasn't easy, but I was proud I did it. (Do I get extra credit for running with him??) Then we hit the grocery store to pick up some provisions and went home. I cooked breakfast for all AND dinner for later. (Mmmmm....meatloaf) Since Tommy had some writing to do, Luke and escaped to a shopping center that had a TJ Maxx, a Toys R Us, a Dollar General and a Petco. So we shopped, shopped, shopped and visited the fish. I even got a good chunk of Christmas shopping done, so I felt productive. :)

Stuff I'm Diggin'

I have some new stuff that I really really really like.

Piano Puzzlers - See below. I'm such a music geek that I listen to them while I run.

Scarves - I've been rediscovering ones I tucked away at the end of last year's cold weather and wearing them whenever I can. I bought a new one at a craft fair and can't get enough of them. If I'm feeling meh about what I'm wearing, I add a scarf and *poof* instant glam.

Strange Parisian Type Cafe Music - At pandora.com I typed in 3 Leg Torso and came up with a nifty conglomeration of music that is just wonky and inspiring. Think Amelie meets Edgar Meyers.

Raising Hope - Funny. Just funny funny stuff. I need some goofball humor in my life. And how can you go wrong with Martha Plimpton and Chloris Leachman? Just crazy, dysfunctional fun.

The Event - Yeah, I know, it's kind of a ripoff of Lost, but since I didn't watch Lost, I'm not really affected by that comparison. I've only seen 2 episodes, but already I'm hooked. Plus, EVERYONE is in this show.

Chef of the Future

A new recipe that debuted in the Jordan household:

Decadently delicious pasta with brown butter, pine nuts and eggs. It's unbelievably delicious and super easy. But incredibly heavy. We decided it cannot be made more than once a month, if that. I actually stopped at Trader Joe's to get the pine nuts and pasta. And it was well worth it - without the pine nuts, it just would've been overly buttered pasta. Yum.

*Warning* Musical Geekiness Ahead

So I'm addicted to something new lately. And it's slightly embarrassing to share. I discovered it one Sunday night driving home, listening to WQXR. They were airing an installment of "Performance Today", hosted by the charming and interesting Fred Child. And all of a sudden I heard the "Hello Fred" chord played by Bruce Adolph who takes a familiar tune and embeds it into a piece of classical music or a conglomeration of classical tunes. Yes...it is...the Piano Puzzler! I was hooked instantly. Now I download 20 at a time to listen to while walking in the park. I feel victorious when I can name both the tune and the composer. I laugh at all the geeky musical jokes Bruce and Fred make. I fantasize about being a contestant myself and nailing the Puzzler in record time. I know. I know....shameful. But it's sheer genius. I mean, Bruce not only takes a tune (be it a Beatles song, or a Broadway show tune, an old standard or a folk song) but deftly weaves it into a classical tune. I mean, taking Tristan and Isolde and inserting "Maria" from West Side Story? Brilliance. Love it, love it, love it. Plus, Fred is like the coolest host ever. He gives assistance when necessary without making the guessee feel stupid.

I Need a Weekend After My Weekend

I had quite the busy weekend. Friday night luckily was quiet, but Saturday I woke up early and Luke was still sleeping, so I decided to do the walk without him and try....running. I know, I know, in the past I've thought people who ran for no reason as strange. But there's been something inside me telling me or rather urging me to run. I lasted maybe 4 or 5 blocks all together, but now it's become something I want to beat. It's like because I don't have any concrete grad school plans, I need something else to accomplish or achieve. So....I'm unofficially going to try to train for a 5K. I think. There's a website that has a very reasonable training program. And I've been scouting craigslist for a cheap cheap cheap jogging stroller. So we'll see.

After the nuttiness that was my attempt at running, Luke had OT and then we set off for the Pepsico Sculpture Gardens. I visited them a LOT when I was in college and I have some nice, artsy shots from those days. But I figured Luke would enjoy it. He did...mostly. He had some issues with listening about running off and wrenching his little arm out of our grip, but for the most part he liked the ponds and the vegetation. We had lunch/early dinner at a very kid-friendly restaurant called Q.

Sunday, Luke and I hit the park and did our usual walk. It was so nice out. I felt like I could've walked double what I did, but as usual, the errands were calling me and I knew Luke would stage a revolt if he passed the swings one more time. Then it was off food shopping, run home, receive 5 bags of hand-me-downs from a dear friend who has given Luke some very nice things, take a quick shower and hit the Italian Fest at Hofstra. Happily for them it was very well attended. Unhappily for Luke/Mom/Me it meant navigating the stroller all over, a cranky Lucas and a hot and tired me.

Unfortunately, the weekend ended with probably one of the worst nights for us to date. Luke has been having trouble going to sleep. My theory is that with it getting darker earlier, it's taken away his time to look at his books and gently settle into sleep. He's getting put into the crib when it's pitch black outside. Needless to say, there's been lots of screaming, hysterical crying and frustration. And that's just me. I can only imagine what Luke's feeling. But last night, I had to cave and take him into the bed at 3am - and even then, it took almost 3 hours for him to fall asleep.

Luckily, Starbucks is a panacea for mornings that follow nights like this one. He's lucky he's so delicious, otherwise I'd start looking up gypsies in the phone book.

What I Did On My Summer Vacation

I know. I've been an absentee blogger. I can blame it on many many things:

-Trying to sort out all of Luke's transition from Early Intervention to CPSE stuff. (Found a school, got his evaluations done, now just playing the waiting game.)
-Playing in a production of Summer of '42, a few weddings with my quartet and an outdoor concert with the West Islip Symphony.
-Working my butt off. (Yup, still love my job)

But it wasn't all work as I:

-Saw Sting in concert with my mom at Jones Beach. (Easily the best concert I've EVER been too - that's huge praise from a musician.)
-Went to the beach a few times (in a bathing suit no less) with Lukey Bear who LOVES the water.
-Went to the LI Children's Museum, which was sort of fun as there were a million campers there that day.
-Went to weddings for 2 people in my quartet (that's 50%!) and cha-cha-ed at one of them!
-Traveled up to Lake George for one of said weddings
-Ate at Cracker Barrel for the first time
-Turned 35. (*sigh*)

Lots of good stuff.

And Luke's making progress. His vocabulary is now up to about 25-30 words. And he smiles constantly. I could eat. him. up.

Greed.....Not So Good?

Wow. I was surprised to read this. Michael Douglas has Stage IV throat cancer. But was so so pleasantly refreshed to read that:

a.) He openly admits his cancer was caused by drinking and smoking.
b.) He talks about how his chemo and radiation have knocked him on his a$$.

I also felt some camraderie for the poor guy in that he went undiagnosed at first. Sounds verrrry familiar to my story where I was first put on 3 different antibiotics, then told I had pneumonia, then told I had a benign tumor and then was finally diagnosed correctly with NHL.

Not to mention the fact that he had to tell his 2 small children about how sick he was. I pray every day that Lucas will never have a sick parent.

Sending the good vibes, thoughts and prayers westward to Hollywood.

An open letter to music

Dear Music,

I'm so sorry. I didn't know. I didn't know how you'd be there for me all the time. I didn't know how you'd permeate every bit of my life. How I'd hear a simple cello line in a song and wonder, "Could that have been me?" I didn't know how I'd relish spending my precious little free time transforming you from a piano/vocal score, fleshing you out into a four part concoction for the girls to play. I didn't know I'd get to the point where I panic if my cello isn't prominent in the rear view mirror, thinking I forgot it on the way to a gig. I didn't know how you would give me goosebumps to play gentle lines, being part of something bigger than myself. I didn't know that you would fill me the way you do and be missed when you're not there. Would I not love you as much if you were my profession? Would I feel you as a weight on me instead of a joy? I don't know. Was I simply scared of failing you in not pursuing you? I don't know what the future holds for us, but I promise to keep you as close as you are now. I promise to do the best I can.

Love,
Tiffany

Recent Acquisitions

So things have not been all together entirely bad. I've made a bunch of delightful new discoveries:

• Ben Folds (Five) and Rufus Wainwright- The "Who Do You Think You Are" (a song from Elvis Costello's The Juliet Letters - Hello - male vocalists out there: Please arrange to do a concert of this suite of songs - they're available in print. Thank you.) station on my pandora.com account has yielded many musical goodies. I can hear on this station items ranging from Norah Jones (who, in my opinion is not overhyped at all, but quite the opposite - this girl is immensely talented), to wonderfully unique versions of Bjork songs backed by strings, to show tunes from Spring AwakeningThe Last 5 Years. Figuring prevalently in this cavalcade of musical powerhouses are Ben Folds (with and without Five) and Rufus Wainwright. I'd run away from home with my cello (and Lucas since he loves music too) and join either of them on tour. Ben Folds (who personally, is a little creepy as he's on his 4th marriage) writes songs with musical complexity and intelligence - dizzying piano lines and melodies. Rufus Wainwright writes and sings the most soulful crooning. He's so old-school that he replicated Judy Garland's 1961 concert at Carnegie Hall. (It's so cool, he's even imitated what her album cover looked like.) So I've been wrapping this music around me and letting it carry me through the day.
• Peanut Butter Kandy Kakes - I thought I had tried these and not liked them. So when I saw them at WalMart for $2, I figured I'd just give them a second chance and be happy if it worked and it would be no great loss if it didn't. Well. One bite and I was hooked. These are serious stuff for a chocolate/peanut butter freak like me. They're also on the smallish side which means either: a.) You don't feel horribly bad after eating one little pack or b.) You feel you have rights to eat many of said little packs. But they're just incredibly tasty and I think I'll have to keep a steady supply of them in my fridge. Luckily Luke is still not allowed to have nuts yet or I think there'd be a smackdown over these.
• Speaking of whom.....he's discovered how to use a straw. This is good in that it's helping with his speech. This is bad because now any time he sees a beverage with a straw, he wants in on it. So my iced coffees must now be sampled by Mr. Bear. I must remember to keep straws out of my jack and cokes and scotch.
• Cottony Dresses From Old Navy - I scored 2 of these at $15 each. One navy and white striped and one in a fuchsia type of pink. Both can be dressed up or down for summery comfort.
• Flavored Seltzer - I've been drinking this for a couple of months now, but I still can't get over how much I like it. Now that I've been guzzling it, I'm surprised at how sweet regular soda is. My favorite variety is Vintage Cherry Flavored Seltzer, but I'll drink the store brand stuff too.
• MAC Lip Liner in Spice - This is actually a re-discovery. I had a college roommate who gave me her pencil since she was getting a new one and raved about how it went with everything. And it does. It's my go-to when I'm running out the door. I carry it with me everywhere and slap it on under a shiny gloss.

So I've found a few new favorites, some tasty discoveries and some treasures.

Who Do You Think You Are?

Last week was not a particularly easy one in my world. I was told that my amazing, delicious, bright, beautiful, socially outgoing baby boy scored sufficiently on the ADOS test to be placed "on the spectrum". What? Who are you to tell me this sweet boy has some flaw? Luke still doesn't have much of an oral vocabulary (his receptive vocabulary astonishes me sometimes though, as he responded appropriately to "if you want a snack, get some grapes out of the refrigerator") so we were advised to have him re-tested in a few years when his 'speech comes in'. It threw me for a quite a while. I was fully prepared for those words, but until I actually heard them I didn't accept it. So. There it is. It does mean that Luke's eligible for more structured, intense services, so that's the plus side here. Our wonderful pediatrician has said that he believes that by the time kindergarten comes around, he'll have caught up with his peers and you won't even know that he's received services.

And on top of that, I discovered that Hofstra no longer accepts people into the 2 graduate programs I was interested in. Argh.

Alright Already, I'm Just a No-Goodnik

Okay. So I've been slightly tardy with a new blog post. I blame life. I've been working diligently at my new(ish) job (which I still LOVE LOVE LOVE). I've been playing non-stop. Seriously. I've been playing just about every weekend (with an errant cello-free weekend peppered here and there) since February. Honest. Just ask the husband and son who woefully eye me as I leave the house. Not to mention the general house stuff, laundry, cooking, grocery shopping, and small child care. So to recap:

February (and part of March) found me playing "The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee" at Smithtown (my new home-away-from-home) Performing Art Center. I love that theatre. It's an old movie theatre and it's got charm and coziness. I know where everything is. I love that WalGreen's is right next door to it (facilitating errand running prior to curtain and during intermission!). But I really loved this show. Small pit - only 5 of us: piano, keyboard, reed, cello and percussion. By the end we were really rockin' it. It was one of those rare shows where my heart would beat a little faster when it started and I just reveled in playing. I'd just simply feel the music surround me. I know, I know, I sound like a huge geek, but what can I say? I am a music geek. But there were just some of those musical moments where you get to play a great line, or have a touching, mushy solo and life is good for a while. (Here's a link to one of the numbers from the show - coincidentally it's my favorite song and actually ME playing! )

Then there was a cavalcade of musical engagements, it being the height of High School Musical Season. There were 2 different productions of "Thoroughly Modern Millie" (which I will be doing AGAIN in May), a week of living in my office since we were doing a concert of Rodgers and Hart songs here in the playhouse and last week was "Pippin" at Freeport High School. Sunday finds me doing a chamber concert and then I am FREE for a little while.

Not much going on in other news. Lucas still is our silent little guy. He has a few words, but he's darn protective of them. But he's delicious. I have no other word for him but delicious. In the mornings we snuggle in bed before starting our days. He is full of hugs and kisses. He actually makes a "mmmmm" sound when he gives a kiss now. He loves any and all things musical. He vocalizes along with Ben Vereen when he sings "On the Right Track" from Pippin. He squeals in delight when he hears the opening piano line of "And The Beauty Is" from "The Light in the Piazza". He's my little musical buddy. I just can't get enough of him. At the end of a long work day followed by a grueling rehearsal or show, when I get home I sneak a peek of him sleeping sweetly and just sigh contentedly.

Life can't all be bad when you've got a munchkin who thinks your his version of Elvis.

Junk Food Junkie

Last night after traipsing around and running errands and coming home later than usual, I decided it was a junk food/lazy night. I ate a delicious burger from Checkers. I had wanted the special bacon cheddar crunch burger they have only occasionally, but I gave Tommy the wrong burger and wound up with just a regular double burger. Of course he couldn't resist, but let me know just how delicious my lost burger was. So I then decided if I wasn't going to eat well, I'd forgo the yoga and just be a couch potato. I did do some work on the couch in front of "The Real World: DC". Hoo Boy. What a crazy fest. I remember when the first season of Real World was on and how old the people on it seemed. (this is unbelievably season #23 I think) Now they all seem so young. And foolish. But of course I was suckered in and watched a whole hour of it before giving up, going to bed and ending my night of slothdom.

Yup, that ole chestnut

Yeah, I decided to tweak and renovate the blog. The dark colors were just too much of a downer. I need some light, some levity, something new and fresh. And I was inspired by BP of that awesome blog, "Southern Circle of Hell: Part Deux" since she gussied up her blog.

But I digress.....I wanted to do a "What Did I Learn in 2009" entry, but got bored after I couldn't really think of anything noteworthy to list. So instead, here is what I'm digging lately:

Pink and Gray. Lots of it. Got a super silvery-gray scarf from the Mr. for Christmas. Bought myself a nifty charcoal scarf from the mall. Got a cute pink sweater from the cookies (Mom and Dad) for Christmas. Bought myself a rilly rilly cute gray tank from J Crew (it's got ruffles and a flower, hence the 'rilly rilly'). I'm just trying to coax myself away from the all-black in my wardrobe and pink and gray look classy with black.

Music. All sorts of stuff. My secret santa at work upgraded my Pandora account for me. How freakin' awesome is that? Now I can listen to ANYTHING. And have been. My top stations are 'cartoony jazz' (based on Raymond Scott), Al Green, Steely Dan and The Bird and The Bee. I have 24 stations right now. I want to run out and buy an internet radio just so I can have it in the bedroom.

Salads. I know it sounds lame, but I really like eating salads. And Trader Joe's has just the yummiest things you can add to salads. Like pistachios, goat cheese, croutons, soy beans. All good eatin'. Plus, with the weight I lost since last year (25 pounds, baby!) I have an incentive to eat salads and low calories veggie soups. Works for me.

Yoga. I have Miss Lori to thank for this one. We started doing lunchtime yoga podcasts and it stuck with me. I do it every night before dinner. Or almost every night. I've been averaging about 6 nights out of 7 a week. AND....over the break I was squeezing in 2 20 minute sessions a day. It makes me feel like cooked spaghetti afterwards and warms me up when it's unbearably cold outside.

Mr. Luke E. Bear. I know it's redundant and obvious that I mention him in a list of things I'm digging lately, but he's just too delicious for words. He's growing so fast that sometimes I can't get over what he's doing. He's making leaps and bounds. He's got a smile that just makes me melt. Cutie boy.

Ahhhh...the joys of toddlerdom

I've read this book about a dozen times in the last 2 days. I'm actually excited it's Luke's favorite book.











I've seen this movie about a MILLION times in the last week or so. But that's okay. It's a fantastic movie. If you haven't seen it, I highly suggest it - children's movie notwithstanding, it's worth it just to 'see' Ellen Degeneres's portrayal of Dory.

If you must buy a car....

Buy it from Brown's Jeep Chrysler in Patchogue. I had to have my PT Cruiser serviced since my brake light was on and they couldn't have been more amazing. I showed up this morning at 7:20 a.m. anticipating arguing that I was supposed to have a loaner, that I'd have to wait in a long service line (like at Saturn), that I'd have to prove that I had a service warranty, but to my delight it was easy. They:

• took me right away
• saw that I had Lucas with me and gave me a Jeep as a loaner instead of a Charger (which I would have gladly zoomed around in)
• answered all my questions patiently
• helped me get Luke's carseat into the loaner
• were friendly as all hell

AND.....what I brought the car there for is COVERED! Woo hoo!

Why I Love Being a Musician

I popped "Piazza" back in the car's cd player. I think it has surpassed "Last 5 Years" as my favorite show. I really do. As much as I loved L5Y and what an intense, amazing cello book it has, Piazza is just....swoony. There's no other way to describe it. It's lush and sweeping. It's heartwrenching and beautiful. And when I listen to it I'm instantly transported to playing it 2 summers ago. I can remember all the little nuances in the score. I can remember all the little moments when Susan and I'd peek at each other enjoying a little string duet. I can remember emitting a little tiny 'yehaw' when Donna and I made it through that perilous, rhythmic passage.

Now I'm listening to the soundtrack from "The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee" which I'll be doing in February. It's a teeny pit. Lots of delicious cello lines. Lots of hysterically funny lyrics and wildly outrageous characters. But there's a song. "The I Love You Song". It brings tears to my eyes every time I listen to it. It's heartbreakingly gorgeous and sad and touching. I can't wait to play it. And fall in love with another cello book.

And the beauty is.....

So I've been absent for a while. I had a rather large life change. I got a new job. A. New. Job. I was at my old job for 9 years. Nine. Years. Longer than I had been in both high school and college. Longer than I had been anywhere. Needless to say, it was a bit of an adjustment. I don't do quite so well with change. I had a hard time saying goodbye to the friends I had made there. These are people who saw me get married, battle cancer and have a baby. These are people who sent me food and flowers when I was sick, danced with me at my wedding and visited my son after he was born. I had known every in and out of my job. I had answers for any problem that would come up. I was told by the chair of the board of trustees that I was one of the 2 people she would go to when she had a question no one could answer.

My new job is at Hofstra University. The. Hofstra. University. The place I spend weeks at a time when ensconced in a show there. My office is IN the playhouse. The playhouse I've played at countless times. I step out of my office (and a cute, happy office it is), go up a few stairs and I'm standing in the balcony of the theatre. I love it.

So, as sad as I was to leave said old job, I'm happy as a clam. My new co-workers are incredibly nice, there's tons of possibility for me to do good things there and I'm already feeling productive.

As Little Red sings in "Into the Woods": "(It) made me feel scared, Well, excited and scared." I hear those lyrics in my head each day I've parked in the lot next to the playhouse.

Excited and scared is a good place to be I think.

What I Learned (and did) On My Summer Vacation

Okay, so this post is a little tardy, but I still feel like I've got to make the effort. I had a summer that seemed to fly by. Busy at work, didn't even get to take my full vacation, but I squeezed a lot in there.

What I Learned:
That I absolutely love being a mom to an amazing little boy.
That said little boy LOVES the beach and would throw himself in the ocean given half a chance.
That I love salads with chicken more than anything.
That yoga daily has done more for my body than all those hours spent at the gym.
That yoga + walking + eating healthier has started to make me look like pre-cancer me again.
That it is possible to reclaim one's abs after a c-section.
That sometimes the best things in life are free.
That my son is a daredevil and will go on any carnival/amusement park ride I will let him on.

What I Did:
Played about a half dozen weddings with the Prima Quartet - the best looking and sounding string quartet on Long Island.
Got to hang out with Merry Berry, who I miss terribly.
Took Luke to a few carnivals and stuck him on a few fire engines, boats and merry-go-rounds.
Met Annie and Ahmed and Ismaeel at Adventureland where we put the boys on rides together.
Went one night to see Stealin' Dan which rocked out for over 2 hours and was easily the best concert I've ever seen. And it was free. I have to expound here - the concert was at the Sayville Marina beach - which is on the body of water between the south shore of LI and Fire Island. It was an incredibly muggy night and it was delicious to be by the ocean breeze. No one wanted to go with me, so I went all by myself. Which was fine, because I could sit anywhere I wanted, no one talked to me and I sang out loud to all the songs. They were awesome. Steely Dan is a top notch band which used some of the all-time best studio musicians. Stealin' Dan didn't disappoint. They actually played Aja. They played all my favorites. (Except for Deacon Blues) They played for 2 hours. I was in heaven. Since I couldn't justify spending $80 for Steely Dan tickets, this was a good compromise.

So, all in all it was a good summer. We made it through with not too many bumps and bruises and had some fun.

New Duds

I went "back to school" shopping with my mom and got some cute duds. I got 3 dresses:This one makes me feel like a "Mad Men" extra. I feel cute and sassy in it.
This one actually makes me look forward to chillier weather. I can't wait to pair it with low-heeled boots.And this one I'm saving for the Fall Fair Preview Party to look pretty and dolled up in.

Diamond Dave, No One Can Hold a Candle

I finally purchased the latest album by The Bird and The Bee. They are my newest favorite group. They compete with Steely Dan for playtime on my pandora.com account. I love the melodies. I love the hipness. I love Inara and want to be her. She looks like a cute spy that you want to hang out with and share Cold War secrets with in the liner notes. I sing along out loud in the car. Listening to them makes me want to go out and overhaul my wardrobe at Anthropologie. I want to wear pencil skirts with matching scarves. I want wear red lipstick and berets. Go give them a listen.

Hello Again, Hello

I am embarrassed beyond belief for the lapse of time between my posts. Honestly though, things have been very sedate lately. Luke's growing like a weed, we're still battling Stony Brook for Tommy's degree and I'm still in one piece.

I've done some reading:











I've done some cooking:







And I've made some changes to my routines. I've been devouring salads. Eat them every day almost for lunch. Give me some baby spinach or arugula and I'm a happy girl. And I've started taking vitamins. Lots of them. I even have an old-person pill organizer. And I'm trying to walk or do yoga every day. My pants are bigger on me and I'm looking a wee bit more svelt, but most of all I feel better in the mornings which is always good. More to come soon. Promise.

Inspiration Strikes

It could be that I was inspired by the beautiful, spring-like weather. It could be that I was inspired by my good-hair-day. (Which was made possible by the new L'Oreal EverPure Moisture Conditioner) Or most likely I was inspired by Molly Wizenberg's book, "A Homemade Life" (go buy it - now) which waxes poetic about cooking in Paris, cooking in Seattle and making salads and homemade dressing. But I had inspiration to build a salad for dinner. One with lots of veggies and homemade dressing. One with poached chicken. I thought a lot about this salad. So much so, that I told Tommy I had to make it for dinner and I'd make him anything he wanted. (He's not really a salad type of guy.) He said, "I could go for a salad with chicken." "Huh? You want a salad? Okay." So he took Lucas home from our outing so I could hit the supermarket and buy what I needed. I felt so European and Parisian shopping for that evening's dinner right then and there. I purveyed the produce section. This is what my amazing, delicious salad contained:

• Arugula from Trader Joe's that I've also been layering on sandwiches
• Radishes that were still on their greens
• Endive
• Goat cheese - I forgot just how much I love goat cheese
• Toasted pine nuts that I happened to have in the pantry
• Poached chicken breast
• Avocado
• Homemade salad dressing which was so simple - dijon mustard, red wine vinegar, salt and olive oil (courtesy of Molly's book)

It was delicious. It was filling. It even made the non-veggie Tommy exclaim "This is delicious!" It even looked a smidge like this:

Ahhhhh....spring time. I can't wait to hit the roadside stands and try more veggie salads.

But I'm Only 33

I was reticent on blogging about this, but I figure you never know who you can educate or help through your experiences.

Last Thursday I had a colonoscopy. There. I said it. Out loud. My last CT scan showed a 'thickening of the colon wall.' Which the gastroenterologist said was probably due to the contrast not making it to the colon, blah blah blah, and to cover our collective doctor asses, we have to do a colonoscopy.

I cried. I cried the whole way home from the doctor's office. I'm tired of being poked and prodded and examined. I'm tired of prepping for invasive tests.

In preparation for this particular test I had to:

Not eat all day the day before, with the exception of 'clear liquids'. Clear liquids mean things they think are food but to your gaping, empty stomach aren't really food. Like broth. And jello. I just kept drinking tea without milk, Sprite and beef broth.

Purchase a half gallon of Gatorade (no red or purple, which of course are the only flavors I drink).

Purchase a bottle of Miralax.

Purchase a package of Ducolax tablets.

Find a 'responsible adult' to drive me to my appointment. Luckily, Tommy squeaked in on this one.

So. I ate nothing but clear liquids the Wednesday before. Of course on this day, there was steak for lunch, a breakfast with eggs and bacon and some little person classroom was baking something. It was torture. I finally gave up and ran a long lunchtime errand - dropping off the cello for some work to be done on it. This kept me in the car for a good hour. Of course, I then noticed how many eateries there are on Grand Boulevard in Baldwin.

At the appointed time of 5:00 I mixed the Miralax (which cautions you on the bottle not to exceed their recommended dosage except under the care of a doctor) - the entire bottle into the Gatorade and started drinking. I learned that you really can't go by instructions - the instructions said to drink 8 oz. every 10-15 minutes. I figured I was fine if I just kept the cup full and kept drinking continuously until the bottle was empty. (I was right - I was told my prep was perfect!)

About 7 or 8 I had to start running to the bathroom. I was well prepared though - I had the latest issue of Bon Appetit, Molly Wizenberg's new book and a puzzle book. But it really wasn't that bad - it wasn't like when you're sick and doubled over in pain, you just have to get to the bathroom quickly. And by the end of that part, I felt pretty good actually.

The next day I kept myself busy with errands. Then we made our way to the office. They were running an hour and a half behind schedule. Grrrrrr. And of course every older person in the waiting room was bitching and moaning about it. It took every nerve I had to keep from yelling, "Shut up! We're all waiting, you're not making it any easier by complaining!"

They called me in and had me change from the waist down. It was actually nice that I could keep my shirt on - it lessened the procedural feel of it. The anesthesiologist came in and got started. Let me tell you - I think sometimes they're more important than the 'main' doctor. The anesthesiologist gets you all set, talks to you and kind of sets the tone. He was great. Then the gastro guy came in. I rolled on my side, asked if I should feel burning when they injected the anesthetic and.....that's all I remember. Honest. Next thing I knew I was waking up. I flexed certain parts of my body, curious to see if I'd notice a pain or anything. Nothing.

Then home I went to relax the rest of the day. Watched "Twilight" (a not-so-bad encapsulation of the book) and ate a panini from Panera with bacon on it. Bacon makes everything better.

I'd take one of these over a CT scan ANY day of the week.

Here Was Peter Cottontail

Here's last year's photo of Mr. Lukey Bear with the EB.

And here's this year's photo. He practically ran up to the bunny, touching his fur and smiling at him. Upon being told we had to say goodbye to the bunny, he threw himself on the ground and screamed.